Men and women might use various aphrodisiacs potions, learn new sexual positions; men might increase the length and size of their organs but in the long term all these endeavours will come to naught if we are unable to care, communicate, touch and cuddle our partners. Often a partner will remember with joy an erotic encounter with us and seek it again not so much due to our techniques but more due to our capacity to communicate with them, to understand them and to give them physical and sensual warmth. Of course the capacity to have better erections and advance sexual techniques play their role and can be of great importance in enhancing a relationship. What I am saying is that they need to be seen in context and as part of a wider capacity to grow closer in more ways than one with our lover.

Incommunicado

Ilaria is a very attractive woman in the classical sense, the type that wherever she goes creates a stir and both men and women turn their heads to look at her. If looks were everything than she would not fail to obtain whatever she wanted in life. However in her mid thirties she is still going from an unhappy relationship to the next. This situation does not surprise me at all!

I met her yesterday after 6 months or more that we had lost touch with one another. During this time many things had happened in both our lives, so after a phone call we decided to meet first for a walk in the park to be followed by an Italian meal later on in the evening. This arrangement would have given us plenty of time to catch up with each other lives and events. As planned we met at about six and spent together about six hours. During this time she not only narrated what had happened to her during the last six months but I can really say that she bombarded me with it! She went into the most meticulous details of her past six months often repeating them endlessly. She did not spare me even the most frivolous anecdotes to embellish her stories. And you know what was the most incredible part of our meeting? In those six hours in which she spoke endlessly 'at me' she did not pause even once to ask me how I was feeling or how the past six months had been for me!

I like Ilaria as a friend because she is filled with zest for life and is a very enthusiastic person, the ideal person to go to a club with for a good dance, but after I have spent an evening with her chatting I feel exhausted, depressed and exasperated! Most men I know would go a long way to be able to sleep with her on account of her good looks but even if I knew that I stood a good chance to have a sexual encounter with her I would not attempt it for all the gold in the world. After talking with her for a few minutes the last thing I would want is to get physically close to her.

She is very keen to find a man that is intelligent, artistic and considerate but she never comes anywhere close to it. On the other hand she attracts rather basic men with whom she has a great sex life but nothing else. This does not surprise me. The kind of man that she craves for would run away after a few encounters. On the other hand the men who pursue her are sexually highly charged and could not care less for her egotistic chatter. What we all need to realise is that being interested is far more important than being interesting and monopolise every form of attention.

This article is part of the ebook 'Sex-Happy', you can learn more about this exciting multi-media presentation by following the link to 'ebooks' on the left.